It's OK to Cry

It was a little league game between the top two teams.  It was a close game and I was the Homeplate umpire.  The pitcher threw as hard as any kid in the league, and he had struck out many that day.  But on this one pitch, he lost control of his fast ball and the ball sailed and hit the batter right in the small of the back.  I heard it, the batter felt it and the crowd even gasped.  The kid fell to his knees and was in a great deal of pain. The coach ran up to him and his first words were, “don’t cry, be tough.”  Then something happened I’ll never forget, the catcher put his arm around the kid and said, “It’s ok to cry, I know I would.”  With that a few tears trickled down his face, we helped the boy up and he trotted down to first base.  I’ve never forgotten the words of that wise little boy who said, “it’s ok to cry, I know I would.”
God created us with emotions and one of those was to express our pain and grief through tears. I agree with the coach that there is a time to be tough, but I also know there are times when you just need to cry.  I am so grateful for the shortest verse in the Bible that we as kids used to all quote that simply says, “Jesus wept.”  John 11:35. When experiencing the death of his friend Lazarus, Jesus shows us his human nature by weeping. The Jews who saw this even said, “See, how He loved him.”  Tears are an expression of pain but also an expression of love.

I recently said in a sermon that grief is not a sin. It is a part of our nature. Some periods of grief are longer than others and every situation is different. I can never put myself in someone else’s shoes.  But I do know that God designed us to grieve for a time but then to move into His grace.  When King David’s baby became gravely ill, David began to grieve, fast and weep. David prayed for days until word came his child had died.  Then David arose, put his robe back on, ate at the table and worshipped God.  When he was asked about his odd behavior he replied, “But now he is dead; why should I fast? Can I bring him back again? I shall go to him, but he shall not return to me.” II Samuel 15:23. David grieved before death, some grieve after death, either way grief shouldn’t last forever. Still there is a gentle reminder, it’s ok to cry, I know I would.

In the beatitudes we find, “Blessed are those who mourn, For they shall be comforted.”  Matthew 5:4. This weekend I have prayed that verse over and over numerous times.  Like you, my heart is broken over the tragedy from the Texas floods. I feel so helpless as I watch and listen to the stories that will impact families forever. As a pastor I would want to speak words of wisdom, but I’ve learned at times it’s best not to say a word.  Just cry with them.  I know deep down in my faith that the Holy Spirit is with every one of these heartbroken families.  He knows their needs greater than all of us combined and He was promised to us as a comforter.  How thankful I am we have the Holy Spirit who reminds us, it’s ok to cry.

Tears are nothing to be ashamed of.  They clear our eyes, express our feelings and lead us to calming our souls.  The response of Jesus to Lazarus death gives us a picture of the importance of tears.  The time of grief is real and needed.  The Psalmist says, “weeping may endure for the night, but joy comes in the morning.”  Psalm 30:5. This is such a comforting verse to us that experience grief.  But the fact is some nights are much longer than other nights. It may take some time, but that is ok. Tears may pop up throughout your life over this period of grief and God knows your heart.  My encouragement to you is this… don’t let your tears drown out your joy.

I cannot imagine what these young parents are going through right now from this Texas tragedy.  My prayers will be with them for the rest of the year. May the love of God cover them and surround them in an amazing way in the days and months to come.  I know one thing for sure, that I would not tell them to be tough but rather I’d say, go ahead and cry, I know I would.